News Update

Everything you ever wanted to know about the Pineapple Conspiracy but were afraid to ask.

Ok, so nothing on the PC; it's too dangerous. Instead, have some news.

Scientology is Bad for You, Mmmkay?

A German official is pushing to have Scientology, which is already considered a for-profit enterprise and swindle machine in the country, banned. Presumably from the country. Initially that strikes me as being a bit much, but then again, we ban the Mafia and other criminal organizations that have killed innocent people for money.

Source: The Associated Press

Brains, the Other White Meat

So a mysterious neurological illness is sweeping the employees at a meat processing plant who, until recently, were charged with removing the brains of pigs with compressed air guns. A lovely task I'm sure. Doctors are baffled, but the symptoms match a more or less incurable autoimmune disorder; the patients seem to recover, which leads them to conclude it isn't likely a prion disease like Mad Cow (though I think it's a bit soon, really; the proper incubation period on some of those prion diseases is several years, so these people might all drop dead half a decade from now).

Of course, the plant is still operating and selling to the public. Because, you know, we can't take any proactive health measures whatsoever. Mystery plague in a meat packing plant? No positive ID on cause? Could be a contagion wending its way through the food supply? NO PROBLEMS!

God.

Source: AP Features/Raw Story

Golden Compass Movie Removes Troublesome Atheism

So the author of the Golden Compass and its two sequels is a public Atheist. His books are full of bitter religious critique, against Christianity in particular. Hollywood wants to make them into a Narnia style blockbuster. The solution: remove all his ideas on religion!

Yeah. Ok. That doesn't smack of crass conformism at all. Meanwhile we have Dominionist whackos who scream bloody murder if they can't put their nativity scene on the courthouse lawn, and who fret endlessly about there being enough Christ in Christmas.

Gag me. Not the way Pullman's being gagged, but gag me nonetheless.

PS: Note the way CNN sells this story. Golden Compass Selling Atheism to Kids? GASP. SOMEONE MIGHT SELL AN INTANGIBLE BELIEF TO YOUR CHILDREN. IT IS AKIN TO AMPHETAMINES. ATHEISM IS THE METH OF THE MASSES
Source: CNN.com

Middle East Roundup

Let's see. Helen Thomas took Dana Peroxide to task a few days ago, and the video has been making the blog rounds. Basically Thomas had the gall to ask our Press Secretary if we'll ever be out of IraqIranWherever, and it led to a nasty spat. Thomas got off the best line by far of course, a simple statement about the Administration's supposed regret over civilian casualties:

'Your regret doesn't bring back a life'

That should go on bumper stickers.

Source: RawStory

In other news, a reporter covering Lebanon for The National Review Online, a right wing lunatic site attached to a right wing lunatic magazine, has been outed as a fabulist and hoaxer after a series of his wild stories were debunked or came into question. Amongst the questionable items? That Hezbollah had developed a 'delayed-acid' bomb that when detonated would make a car's chassis melt in half and the back fall off, Loony Tunes style.

Seriously. They published this.

Sources:

The Huffington Post
The Huffington Post (Specifics on the Acid Bomb)
Jesus' General

Finally, Harry Reid is supposedly considering yet another vote on Iraq, presumably to force El Presidente yet again to dash the hopes of everyone in uniform right before Christmas. This is the right track; I'd say, in fact, don't hold votes on anything else. Just Iraq, every day, all through December and January. People are sick of this insanity, and if they're reminded of it often enough, they just might do something about it. Now's the ideal time, the pro-GOP media conglomerates are running out of TV shows to dull the collective wit.

Source: The Hill